February 27, 2014
Here is a profile description from a man who viewed me this morning. Nothing particularly wrong with it, but isn't it a bit random?
"I like everything except liver unless it's with saut?ed onions a little lemon, butter and white wine. Looking for a gorgeous positive woman who understands and is ready to share what life still has to offer."
Ok, so he's out for liver and love. Ideally, I take it, a woman who would understand his love for liver? Next?
Next would be a man who feels like he needs to tell us (us, being the women who are reading his profile) that he: maintains a 32 inch waist, he's recently shaved his beard and is attracting a lot of attention for it, and that he looks 10 years younger than he is. How many, many men want to tell us that they are young, fit, live for the gym and that they look '10 years younger' than they are, according to friends, or, according to women. Is the 32 inch waist impressive? Sure. That's why Jerry wrote in '32' on all of his jeans on Seinfeld. But is it the end-all? Not to this woman.
I'm going to refer to 'us' often, and I hope that I don't offend anyone. Women who are dating online like myself are varied, complex, wonderful, interesting, and diverse - obviously we are not all the same 'type' of women. That said, I want to relay how I feel like we are all on the same page or fighting the same battle; the battle of what I'd like to call online dating ADD amongst men.
The dishonesty. The mystery. I want anyone who has faced some of the things that I have faced to know that she isn't alone. I will tell you stories of scammers, fake profiles, desperately sad widowers, really intense, angry men, men who ask for my number and then completely vanish after what I've considered to be 2-3 nice exchanges offline......I've met them all online, and only over a period of 8-9 months. Please feel free to learn from my experiences, laugh with me, and share yours in the comments. Ready?
Thank you Sarah for being the voice of honesty in a sea of B.S. In this world who doesn't need an ali? Looking forward to reading about your tales of liver and onions.
ReplyDeleteThat liver thing is a Hannibal/Silence of the Lambs awkward joke, but the misogyny in those films is enough to avoid him. I hear a lot of unhappy stories by women in their late 20's through 40's, but the majority prefer OK Cupid, and also do Match but resent it. E harmony can be a nightmare over 40 for women, honestly, not to mention their social intolerance. I know many who like to look at Tinder, but primarily for laughs and then to have flirtations and then outrage and "come to me in a suburb 20 miles away when I feel the whim at 12:20am when you are asleep" etc. This is good that you are documenting what is out there. BTW, I think my actual good-looking guy friends are not on social media dating as much as just give up or go to bars. So many problems with both of those. I am glad you will not give up, and will also let us know what is out there! ALso, maybe someone would like to just get to know someone and date? Geesh. I heard some people are doing Meet-up, with activities they want, hoping for meeting new people under less pressure. etc.?
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