I suppose this is where I should have started...but it's the painful part.
I spent Memorial Day 2013-Labor Day 2013 speaking to a man that I met on Match.com...we will call him Jerry Anderson, because that is what he called himself. JERRY ANDERSON. I believe that to be his name. I believe that he was in the Philippines at the time of our conversations. I believe that he grew to care about me despite himself, but nothing else about Jerry Anderson was true, nor kind.
I consider myself a street-smart woman. Never have I claimed to be an intellectual, or highly educated - but I inherited my mother's common sense, social intelligence, and I believe that growing up in NYC in the 70's & 80's gives me a badge of honor, of survival, of cynicism that I've earned. Ironically, when one of us (women) is lonely, finally ready after an ugly divorce and several years of being quite happy to be single; when we decide to venture out there, we sometimes do it with blinders on. And, when we WANT so much to believe in someone, in anyone, sometimes I think we ignore our internal red flags and all of our very smart girlfriends' advice. We take the plunge.
I didn't get scammed in the obvious way...I didn't give my savings up for a cause, or anything like that. But there are ways that professionals can find to hurt you financially that you may not see coming. I have an open NYPD/FBI case open on Jerry Anderson so I cannot go into details, but just please, please do not do any favors that you are not 100% sure that you should do, and try to wait until you've met. Jerry Anderson and I have never met and we never will.
If you see the name JERRY ANDERSON please stay far, far away. By the way? My dogs could screen men better and more thoroughly than Match does. I ran into nothing but problems there, and I do not profile myself as wealthy (I'm not), widowed (I'm not) or any of the other qualifications that are usually a magnet to these dishonest men. The only thing I've been faulted with by friends is being too kind. Well, that will not change, I am kind, and I'm pretty sure that if I don't get into heaven it will not be for being kind......
Let's move on. To more amusing fakes. Amou. A very gorgeous (if slightly short) French man I met on Match. I was savvy by then; when Amou said that he'd 'love to meet' but was about to take an international business trip (WARNING - sudden, international trips, unless you are dating an extraordinarily important person, are usually a huge red flag if you've not met yet!!), I said that I wanted proof. He sent me his Delta flight details. Amou & son were apparently truly headed off to South Africa. That's the hard part about scammers; they throw real details into the mix and you feel like you have some sort of proof that they exist, 'look!' I said to my girlfriend, 'he's really going to Cape Town!'...Jesus, how my standards have fallen. I'm excited just by not being lied to by a man. Like I drew the freaking golden ticket because there is some truth, somewhere in there.
Flash forward, Amou reached the airport, called me, and reportedly was 'so fatigued' that he'd mistakenly checked his bag with his laptop and wallet in it. Guess what? Bag never made it to the other side of the world, and Amou wanted me to wire him some cash. I refused, obviously, I was onto him. The next couple of days played out like a scene from Les Mis....Amou & his boy were poor, stranded, apparently having no other resources but me (???) and staying in a cheap motel while his son suffered from asthma attacks. Why he could not go to a hospital, a consulate, a church, a business colleague, I've never understood. What I do understand? Is that a couple of days later, I saw Amou's picture on Match - but with a different profile name - happily taking an African safari...no sign of poverty, ill son or even a frown on his face. I typed under his photo "nice pic! was this by any chance taken in South Africa?" - an hour later his profile was gone from Match. I reported him to Match, but I'm fairly certain at this point that they don't really care. I'm a serial reporter. More to come....
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